Have you ever seen something and just stopped to think about how amazing it is? You know, the stuff that you wonder how or why someone eger came up with it. Here are a few of the thoughts and inventions that impress me. I was thinking about this the other day and came up with a few, but didnt't write them down soon enough. What are some of the things tha impress you?
1. Airplanes - Jumbo Jets - can fly. I know, I know - aero dynamics create a vacume over the wings and build pressure under the wings causing lift. But geez, many of them are in excess of 400 TONS! It just amazes me.
2. Complicated machinery. Did you ever look at the gear box of an automatic transmission? The web of pipes in a refinery? The motherboard on your computer? Somebody actually thought that stuff up and then built it! My hat is off to all inventors. A lot more thinking and focus than I ever had.
3. Beer. Hey, I have an idea. Let's boil this stuff, mix in some other things, let it sit for a while and then drink it. And it was good. Genius.
4. Babies know to take in nourishment through their mouths out of the womb. It is not like they had to get food that way while in the womb. I watched both of my kids eat with absolute amazement (now that they are teens, it is just funny to watch them - especially if I can make them laugh just as they take a bite of something).
Monday, December 17, 2007
Friday, December 14, 2007
A Puzzling Blonde
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."
Her boyfriend asks, "Whatʼs it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her, looks her in the eye, and says,
"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."
He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then .." he said with a deep sigh, ...
"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."
Her boyfriend asks, "Whatʼs it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her, looks her in the eye, and says,
"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."
He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then .." he said with a deep sigh, ...
"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."
The Blonde Picture
Two blondes are walking down the street one day when they find a compact on the ground.
One of them picks it up, opens it, and looks into the mirror. “Hey, this picture looks kind of familiar,” she says.
The other blonde grabs the compact, looks into the mirror, and says, “You idiot, that’s me!
One of them picks it up, opens it, and looks into the mirror. “Hey, this picture looks kind of familiar,” she says.
The other blonde grabs the compact, looks into the mirror, and says, “You idiot, that’s me!
Blonde Wishes
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead have been stuck on a deserted island for 10 years. One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp.
They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie. The genie says, "Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one."
The brunette says, "I've been stuck here for 10 years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home." POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family.
Then, the red head says, "I've been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too." POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family.
The blonde sits down on the beach and looks around, thinking that, despite being stuck here, she did have some good times with her fellow castaways. Suddenly, she starts crying uncontrollably.
The genie asks, "My dear, what's the matter?"
The blonde whimpers, "It is so lonely here and I don't know what to do, I wish I had my friends back." POOF!
They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie. The genie says, "Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one."
The brunette says, "I've been stuck here for 10 years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home." POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family.
Then, the red head says, "I've been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too." POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family.
The blonde sits down on the beach and looks around, thinking that, despite being stuck here, she did have some good times with her fellow castaways. Suddenly, she starts crying uncontrollably.
The genie asks, "My dear, what's the matter?"
The blonde whimpers, "It is so lonely here and I don't know what to do, I wish I had my friends back." POOF!
Blondes and Hailstorms
A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop.
The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing happened.
So she blew a little harder, and still nothing happened.
Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?"
The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Duh, like hello! You need to roll up the windows first."
The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing happened.
So she blew a little harder, and still nothing happened.
Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?"
The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Duh, like hello! You need to roll up the windows first."
Blonde and a Fairy
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are crossing an enchanted bridge in Magical Fairyland when they run into a fairy.
The fairy says that they can be granted a transformation if they jump off the bridge and call out their wish.
The brunette immediately jumps off the bridge and yells "Eagle!" She turns into a beautiful bird of prey and flies away.
The redhead jumps off the bridge and yells out "Salmon!" She turns into a gorgeous shimmering salmon and swims upstream to spawn.
The blonde is at this point so excited that she jumps off the bridge without thinking of her wish. Suddenly, she panics and yells "Crap!"
The fairy says that they can be granted a transformation if they jump off the bridge and call out their wish.
The brunette immediately jumps off the bridge and yells "Eagle!" She turns into a beautiful bird of prey and flies away.
The redhead jumps off the bridge and yells out "Salmon!" She turns into a gorgeous shimmering salmon and swims upstream to spawn.
The blonde is at this point so excited that she jumps off the bridge without thinking of her wish. Suddenly, she panics and yells "Crap!"
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Welcome!
Since this is my first entry to this blog, I would like to welcome all readers. I hope I can post some interesting and sometimes witty comments here that someone would find interesting (besides me).
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